10 things I had forgotten about having a newborn

My latest addition is now 9 days old!

Having had two before I guess I thought I knew what to expect but here are 10 things I had totally forgotten about having a newborn...

1.  How wonderful they smell.

2.  How three hours of night time sleep can feel amazing!

3.  How all consuming their needs can feel and yet how simple they are.

4.  Just how difficult it is to make their arms and legs be inside a sleepsuit.

5.  How much longer it takes to leave the house.

6.  How being stuck in traffic, especially if they have fallen asleep in the car, feels like you have a ticking time bomb in the back that you are completely powerless to defuse.

7.  How your heart will break if they are crying for more than about 30 seconds and you're not in a position to meet their needs in that moment.

8.  How much washing can be generated by one tiny person (both their own and also by puking/weeing/pooing on your clothes)

9. How grateful you can feel if someone appears with a meal or a competent pair of helpful hands!

10.  How  completely, totally and utterly besotted you can be with someone who can barely give you anything in return.

So grateful

Today I hold my little girl tight and I cry, they are tears of joy for what I have and tears of sadness for my friend who is today having a medical miscarriage because her baby will not be able to survive and will put her own health at risk.

I waited such a long time for my chance to be a Mum, but not because of infertility (which my friend also knows about, this is an IVF miracle baby) and not because of loss, I am very blessed to have fallen pregnant on my third cycle of trying and have carried my first ever baby to full term, my wait was because of my own illhealth.

Therefore I just can't imagine that pain, the suffering that must come with losing your child.

Today I just weep, for what my friend has lost and what I have gained even though I do not deserve it.

I thank God (quite, quite literally) for her and for all she is, even at 3am!

an older picture of Naomi, but still one of my favourites.

The things everybody assumes you know...

I remember a long time ago, before I was even pregnant with Naomi, sitting and chatting with one of my friends.  We were talking about the fact that because all my friends had babies they assumed that I knew things about pregnancy/giving birth/being a Mum that I just didn't.  She said, "oh yes, I remember I found out about the post-pregnancy bleeding that way, I was already pregnant but I wasn't sure I wanted to be any more".  My face fell.  "Post-pregnancy bleed? What bleed?"

This was my first major introduction to the topic of things everyone assumes that all (want to be) pregnant people and new mums know.  I didn't know about the bleed (which in my case lasted 9 weeks!!) and I didn't know that it was quite normal to throw up in labour and I didn't know that it was quite normal to be constipated for most of your pregnancy and then much of the first few weeks after birth.

My biggest complaint at the moment, though, is that I didn't know about the hair loss!!!

I washed my hair this morning, after this I brushed it, here is a before and after shot of my hair brush.

I now realise that this is just what happens at the end of being pregnant, you lose all the hair you didn't lose for those 9 months and so it isn't unreasonable - but my whole house and baby and self is covered in hair that I am losing.  I'm not sure how I haven't gone bald yet! How much longer can this last for?!

And always, in the back of my mind, I am wondering, what else don't I know about?!