I have realised that since my husband went away (so far it has been 4 days) I have lost count of the number of times I have had to persuade Naomi to be asleep.
Be it for naps or for night time sleeping, my little girl doesn't want to do it! I can spend easily 30-40 minutes getting her to go down for each nap and although night time tends to be a little easier she has taken to waking up. Often.
For the first several weeks of her life she was amazing sleeper, she even slept through for about 3 weeks when she was only about 10 weeks old. We used to joke that we wouldn't know what to do if we had a "real" baby. And that's the rub, we don't!
We go on holiday shortly and don't think it is fair on Naomi to change things before we go, and then obviously we won't change things on holiday and when we come back we want to give her a couple of weeks to settle back in, but then we have decided we will do some "sleep training". I have mixed feelings about it but we can't keep going the way we are and as a result I am counting down the days!
I know it is a controversial subject but the bouncing/rocking/wearing out my knees/wearing out my back/having no energy left just has to go. I cannot do it any more, this has been made all the more obvious to me while hubby is away, making my child sleep actually makes me want to break out into tears, and sometimes I do cry about it, so it is time for a change.
I just hope I can hold out that long, 6 weeks and counting!
Showing posts with label Being Alone. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Being Alone. Show all posts
Friday, 15 July 2011
Tuesday, 12 July 2011
Home Alone
Hubby has gone away, he left last night and doesn't get back till Saturday.
I HATE when he goes away, I really am a better mother when he is here, I get too stressed and anxious while he is away. Even before I was a mother I coped much better when he was around compared to when he was gone, but now the contrast seems even stronger.
Stuff that I normally do without thinking about it (like eating) becomes a major struggle and now I have to make sure I do everything for Naomi, I become even more of an afterthought. I decided not to brush my teeth last night for having come upstairs, I couldn't face going down our squeaky stair case and waking the baby, again! if hubby had been here, I would have brushed my teeth for he would have been here to help *if* she had woken.
Even going to baby groups, which I normally do to help me get through the day with some remnants of sanity in tact, becomes much more difficult, becomes much more challenging and so often gets forgotten about, before I know it the only words I have spoken out loud are "What a big poo" and "Is somebody tired?" (yes, me!) which does my ability to cope no good at all.
The hardest time is that time between when hubby would normally get home from work and baby going to bed, I feel like I normally rely on hubby to keep us going through that time and now I have to pull some energy from a place that doesn't exist and do that myself :-(
So how do you cope when you are home alone with the baby?
I HATE when he goes away, I really am a better mother when he is here, I get too stressed and anxious while he is away. Even before I was a mother I coped much better when he was around compared to when he was gone, but now the contrast seems even stronger.
Stuff that I normally do without thinking about it (like eating) becomes a major struggle and now I have to make sure I do everything for Naomi, I become even more of an afterthought. I decided not to brush my teeth last night for having come upstairs, I couldn't face going down our squeaky stair case and waking the baby, again! if hubby had been here, I would have brushed my teeth for he would have been here to help *if* she had woken.
Even going to baby groups, which I normally do to help me get through the day with some remnants of sanity in tact, becomes much more difficult, becomes much more challenging and so often gets forgotten about, before I know it the only words I have spoken out loud are "What a big poo" and "Is somebody tired?" (yes, me!) which does my ability to cope no good at all.
The hardest time is that time between when hubby would normally get home from work and baby going to bed, I feel like I normally rely on hubby to keep us going through that time and now I have to pull some energy from a place that doesn't exist and do that myself :-(
So how do you cope when you are home alone with the baby?
Friday, 8 July 2011
Well that has been a terrible day
Today went badly. It might be the worst day I can remember since I became a mummy.
We started with vomiting which meant that we had to cancel the coffee with another mummy friend and baby group, having just got her over a viral gastroenteritis I didn't feel it would be wise to start turning up to places with babies. After the weekend we had last weekend, it also meant a trip to the doctor, mainly to put my mind at ease.
The day continued with a complete and utter disregard for napping, at 12 noon I made her nap by putting her in the sling, but this left me attached to her and meant I could do none of the things on my to-do list (one of which was drink water, though I forgot to do that rather than being quite that disabled) and meant I got very little rest even when I was sitting down. She woke at about 1pm which meant that having woken at 8am and being only 5 months old she had already not napped enough.
Come 2.30 she was knackered again, so despite it not being that long I start the process of getting my very tired baby to nap, though apparently it is not as easy to do that as you might like. I tried for 2 hours before I gave up, although in that 2 hours I shed many tears and got frustrated with everything. In the morning she had been sick on her pram and because she hadn't napped in her cot in the morning I had been unable to "deal" with that, so I couldn't even fall back on my take-her-for-a-walk-in-the-pram back up napping technique. I cried down the phone at my Mum, I texted my husband who was in meetings most of the afternoon, I complained on twitter then wished I hadn't for people didn't say *exactly* what I wanted them too (I don't know what I wanted them to say, mind you, and having reviewed the responses they were all completely appropriate! I complained on facebook. At times I put her down in her cot, came downstairs and cried as I listened to her cry through the monitor. At times I tried to comfort her with a cuddle or with her dummy.
In the end, my husband finished his meetings and phoned me, he was coming home (I love my husband's job, super-flexible doesn't even describe how flexible it is!), all I had to do was survive another 20 minutes and he would be here to help.
When he got home, everything got a little easier and everything certainly felt much easier. What a shame that he leaves for Dublin on Monday where he will be working for 6 days :-(
We started with vomiting which meant that we had to cancel the coffee with another mummy friend and baby group, having just got her over a viral gastroenteritis I didn't feel it would be wise to start turning up to places with babies. After the weekend we had last weekend, it also meant a trip to the doctor, mainly to put my mind at ease.
The day continued with a complete and utter disregard for napping, at 12 noon I made her nap by putting her in the sling, but this left me attached to her and meant I could do none of the things on my to-do list (one of which was drink water, though I forgot to do that rather than being quite that disabled) and meant I got very little rest even when I was sitting down. She woke at about 1pm which meant that having woken at 8am and being only 5 months old she had already not napped enough.
Come 2.30 she was knackered again, so despite it not being that long I start the process of getting my very tired baby to nap, though apparently it is not as easy to do that as you might like. I tried for 2 hours before I gave up, although in that 2 hours I shed many tears and got frustrated with everything. In the morning she had been sick on her pram and because she hadn't napped in her cot in the morning I had been unable to "deal" with that, so I couldn't even fall back on my take-her-for-a-walk-in-the-pram back up napping technique. I cried down the phone at my Mum, I texted my husband who was in meetings most of the afternoon, I complained on twitter then wished I hadn't for people didn't say *exactly* what I wanted them too (I don't know what I wanted them to say, mind you, and having reviewed the responses they were all completely appropriate! I complained on facebook. At times I put her down in her cot, came downstairs and cried as I listened to her cry through the monitor. At times I tried to comfort her with a cuddle or with her dummy.
In the end, my husband finished his meetings and phoned me, he was coming home (I love my husband's job, super-flexible doesn't even describe how flexible it is!), all I had to do was survive another 20 minutes and he would be here to help.
When he got home, everything got a little easier and everything certainly felt much easier. What a shame that he leaves for Dublin on Monday where he will be working for 6 days :-(
Thursday, 30 June 2011
Child Free Morning!
A friend had noticed from my facebook statuses (what is the plural of status?) that I was getting a bit stressed, that I was feeling the toll of being a Mummy 24 hours a day 7 days a week and that having moved so recently I didn't know who to turn to in order to get a break. She didn't know me that well but she is a registered child minder and thought she would offer to take my wee one for 3 hours. I jumped at the chance.
I thought it would be good for Naomi to learn that sometimes Mummy will go away but that she will always come back. I knew it would be good for me to be able to sit down without watching Naomi or at the very least listening anxiously to the baby monitor as I try and shove another load of washing in the washing machine!
Well, this morning was my child free morning. I was so excited, I needed it so much, I had a pile of sewing to do (a source of pleasure to me, not a stress) and I had a cup of tea with my name on it! The thing is, though, this left me feeling somewhat guilty, about wanting time away from my wee one. Was it right I needed some space that was all about me?
Yes! I have only been away from Naomi a handful of times since she was born and most of those after bed-time. I have been with her almost constantly for 5 months, you spend every waking moment with anyone for 5 months (they get to dictate what those waking hours are, too) and tell me you don't want some space from them. My husband and I have never spent that long with no time apart and I love him unconditionally, why should my daughter be any different?
In the end, I feel great for be able to "forget" about being a Mum for a bit, and Naomi had an absolute blast playing with new toys and people. Will I do it again? Absolutely! Will I feel guilty? Probably, but I'll get over it!
I thought it would be good for Naomi to learn that sometimes Mummy will go away but that she will always come back. I knew it would be good for me to be able to sit down without watching Naomi or at the very least listening anxiously to the baby monitor as I try and shove another load of washing in the washing machine!
Well, this morning was my child free morning. I was so excited, I needed it so much, I had a pile of sewing to do (a source of pleasure to me, not a stress) and I had a cup of tea with my name on it! The thing is, though, this left me feeling somewhat guilty, about wanting time away from my wee one. Was it right I needed some space that was all about me?
Yes! I have only been away from Naomi a handful of times since she was born and most of those after bed-time. I have been with her almost constantly for 5 months, you spend every waking moment with anyone for 5 months (they get to dictate what those waking hours are, too) and tell me you don't want some space from them. My husband and I have never spent that long with no time apart and I love him unconditionally, why should my daughter be any different?
In the end, I feel great for be able to "forget" about being a Mum for a bit, and Naomi had an absolute blast playing with new toys and people. Will I do it again? Absolutely! Will I feel guilty? Probably, but I'll get over it!
Saturday, 14 May 2011
Why it pays to listen!
A few weeks ago, my hubby asked me if he could go to a men's thing that our church was doing. I am desperate for him to make friends (since we moved 6 months ago) so I made sure we didn't have anything clashing in the diary and said yes.
I guess I was a bit sad we were losing out on a Saturday together, the weekends have always been precious to me, but even more so now that we have Naomi here with us.
Well, last week I found out that the men's thing was not just the Saturday as I had thought, but was also overnight and some of the Sunday! My husband tells me that I "knew" this, but I think my baby brain must have filtered it out!
So, despite the fact I hate being home alone overnight (this was true even before Naomi was on the scene) I find myself having accidentally agreed to doing so tonight!
Thankfully some friends from church who are also missing their husband's tonight (to the same men's weekend away) have thought of some things to keep us all occupied so I won't really be on my own till the bedtime routine starts.
I was particularly dreading it as Naomi had stopped sleeping through in favour of a waking often routine, but last night she did sleep right through till 7am (from 8pm) which means I am a little more rested and there is hope for her doing the same again tonight!
Wish me luck people!
I guess I was a bit sad we were losing out on a Saturday together, the weekends have always been precious to me, but even more so now that we have Naomi here with us.
Well, last week I found out that the men's thing was not just the Saturday as I had thought, but was also overnight and some of the Sunday! My husband tells me that I "knew" this, but I think my baby brain must have filtered it out!
So, despite the fact I hate being home alone overnight (this was true even before Naomi was on the scene) I find myself having accidentally agreed to doing so tonight!
Thankfully some friends from church who are also missing their husband's tonight (to the same men's weekend away) have thought of some things to keep us all occupied so I won't really be on my own till the bedtime routine starts.
I was particularly dreading it as Naomi had stopped sleeping through in favour of a waking often routine, but last night she did sleep right through till 7am (from 8pm) which means I am a little more rested and there is hope for her doing the same again tonight!
Wish me luck people!
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